5 Tips to deal with Uncertainty

There's a lot of uncertainty in the air right now. Today’s pace of change is unlike anything we’ve ever seen. Psychologists refer to this as a VUCA (volatile, uncertain, complex and ambiguous) world. Some of you may be thinking... Will I have a job in six months? Will this pandemic go away? Will we have enough money? When will I have peace of mind again? What if my new boss and I don't get along? Will my kids be ok?

Dealing with the uncertainties of life can cause stress and anxiety and in today’s episode I am giving you 5 tips to deal with uncertainty and better prepare ourselves to thrive in these circumstances.

Because demands on us are changing every day, the behaviours that carried us through yesterday are not necessarily what will help us tomorrow.  This means those of us who reflect, are open and quick to learn from experiences and move forward, remain calm in times of difficulty and resist the temptation to be defensive and get sucked into the “doomsdaying” are better prepared to succeed in today’s world. 

We’ve been living in a World of FOMO: Fear of Missing Out to FOGO – Fear of Going Out.

Again the main word here being Fear...

But Fear not! There are proven strategies that you can use to help you get through these uncertain times and improve your overall wellbeing when your emotions cloud your judgment because you can override your brain’s irrational tendencies and handle uncertainty effectively.

1: Let go and accept what is..

The first step to dealing with uncertainty is to let go and accept that we can't control everything. Recognize that there is only so much you can do right now; we are not bulletproof - we are human like everyone else, but we are not powerless.   We all like to be in control. After all, people who feel like they’re at the mercy of their surroundings never get anywhere in life. But this desire for controlling and knowing everything in the future can backfire when you see everything that you can’t control or don’t know as a personal failure. People who excel at managing uncertainty aren’t afraid to acknowledge what’s causing it. In other words, they live in the real world. They don’t paint any situation as better or worse than it actually is, and they analyze the facts for what they are. They know that the only thing they really control is the process through which they manage themselves and reach their decisions. That’s the only rational way to handle the unknown, and the best way to keep your head on level ground. Don’t be afraid to step up and say, “Here’s what we don’t know, but we’re going forward based on what we do know. We may make mistakes, but that’s a lot better than standing still.”

Don’t be afraid to get out of your head and grab a piece of blank paper draw two circles and map out the things you CAN control or Influence in the inner circle and the things you cannot control in the outer circle. Just dump them on the paper and then focus on the main areas that are in your control and influence. This proactive focus on the circle of control reduces your level of focus on the things that concern you and focuses your energy on the things that you can do, removing the unnecessary pressure and distraction caused by a flurry of worries and things outside of your control or influence. Accept uncertainty—allow yourself to stop the struggle. 

2: Quieten the “Chimp” 

As we face uncertainty, our brains push us to overreact. One of my favourite books is called the Chimp Paradox by Steve Peters which is a straightforward layman-friendly explanation for cutting-edge neuroscience on how our brains work.

Uncertainty makes our brains yield control to the limbic system, the place where emotions, such as anxiety and fear, are generated. People who are good at dealing with uncertainty are wary of this fear and spot it as soon as it begins to surface and are able to override this mechanism and shift their thinking in a rational direction and engage our rational brain. In other words, they can contain it before it gets out of control.

Once they are aware of the fear, they label all the irrational thoughts that try to intensify it as irrational fears—not reality—and the fear subsides. Then they can focus more accurately and rationally on the information they have to go on. Throughout the process, they remind themselves that a primitive part of their brain (the chimp) is trying to take over and that the logical part needs to be the one in charge. In other words, they tell their limbic system (Chimp) to settle down and be quiet. We all have an “inner chimp” - a part of our brain that runs on gut feeling and instinct. It can be so easy to listen to that and react without giving it a second of rational thought.

Get curious and start to be more aware of your feelings and emotions. The chimp can appear in a number of different ways... here are some examples to be aware of as it can really affect how you deal with uncertainty:

• Irrational thoughts e.g. everyone here thinks I am not doing a good enough job. Do they? Is there actually any evidence that EVERYONE thinks that? Often it is all in our head - our thoughts affect our emotions and subsequently our behaviour. If you think that, you are likely to feel self-conscious, left out and be much more likely to isolate yourself...
• Self-doubt - constantly telling yourself that you don’t have what it takes, that you are never going to be able to get through this. Don’t listen to the chimp! Of course you can get through this. Tell yourself that every single day. If you listen to the chimp, you will be much more likely to feel defeated.
• Notice the “worry story” you are telling yourself—try to distance yourself from it. If we have beliefs such as, "I should never be uncertain" or "Everything must always stay the same," then uncertainty can be especially challenging to handle. Consider replacing these beliefs with one that is more open-minded and realistic, such as "uncertainty is less than ideal, but it is acceptable and tolerable, I managed through it before and I will and can do it again.”

• Recognize that there is only so much you can do right now-and that makes you human, not powerless. Things will get better soon enough. In the meantime, the way you treat yourself is in your control, so be kind! Recognize the need to rise above fight-or-flight / chimp mode. 

3: Use anxiety distraction techniques. 

Distraction is simply shifting your focus onto something else for a few moments. It can be a good way to fend off any sudden symptoms of anxiety. This can also allow you to “take a step back from the world” and take a more considered approach to the situation, rather than a “reactive” one. If you do this for around three minutes, you will find that any sudden symptoms will dissipate.

Stand up to Anxiety With Some Mood-Boosters, Such As:

• Listen to your favourite music
• Exercise and movement for 30 minutes per day—ideally outside. Exercise has such a profound effect on happiness and well-being that it’s actually been proven to be an effective strategy for overcoming stress and anxiety.
• Consider Meditation / mindfulnes I highly recommend the app Calm.
• Achievement-oriented activity (set yourself a goal like walking or jogging 2km then increase to 3km, 4and so on)
• Something you find pleasant or fun (Gardening, jigsaw puzzles, painting, arts/crafts)
• Get plenty of sleep- Good-quality sleep is essential for a healthy mind and body. Insufficient sleep can have a detrimental effect on your mood, and sleep deprivation increases anxiety levels.

Just 15 minutes a day of focusing on Self-care will help you regain a sense of balance. 

4: Dejá Vu & I will cope again

Remember that you've faced uncertainty before and you’ve survived to tell the tale. The psychological concept of "hindsight bias" says that we tend to create the illusion that everything in our past was certain, when in reality, it really wasn’t certain at all. The fact that you stand here now is proof that you are strong enough to make it through these uncertain times. Take time to think and reflect on what helped you before. Write it down-and then read it when your worrisome thoughts start to take hold.

5: Cultivate Positive Emotions.

Accept that anxiety is a learned behavior. Remind yourself that the feelings of anxiety do not belong to you. When you feel any of those old unwanted sensations, look around and reassure yourself that there are no immediate dangers.

Increase the gratitude, appreciation and joy you do have in your life. Build a complementary set of neural pathways so that your brain begins to default to feelings of joy and relaxation. As you continually instruct your brain’s attention to good feelings, it will notice them more and more often. From this moment forward, anytime you notice yourself feeling particularly good, put your hand on your heart and take a moment to acknowledge how good it feels. Next, give your mind the instruction to seek out more of this good feeling in the future or simply say out loud: “I feel good!”

The ability to manage uncertainty, complexity, volatility and ambiguity is one of the most important skills you can cultivate in an increasingly uncertain world. Try the strategies above, and your ability to handle uncertainty will take a huge step in the right direction.

And in the words of Gary Lightbody the lead singer of one of my favourite bands Snow Patrol, in their song Empress:

“Your mind won't be still
It may not again
You don't think it will
But it will, it will...”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_FgpS3TfvYM